The Difference Between Being Ungrateful and Settling

Americans celebrated Thanksgiving, aka National Elastic Pants Day, last week. This holiday prompts awkward conversations with family members and thoughts about what we're grateful for.

And for most of us, the list is long. When you really stop and count your blessings, it's overwhelming how much richness and opportunity we all have access to.

But what if you don't feel grateful for something that you have? Instead, what if you feel like you're settling for less than you want?

I'm talking about your job, specifically. This is a concern a lot of clients have raised with me over the years. They've said things like:

"My mom said I'm lucky to even have a job."
"My husband doesn't understand why I can't be happy with my 'great' job."
"My job looks perfect on paper, but being in it doesn't feel good."
"I feel selfish for wanting something else because I know other people have it worse."
"I know I need to just be happy with what I have, but I can't make myself."

There's tension between what you feel and what you or others think you should feel. You don't wanna be ungrateful, but your experience of your job is that something is off.

Are you being ungrateful? Or are you settling when you shouldn't be?

Here's the test:

If you can fully acknowledge the blessing of what you have and you still want something different, that's not being ungrateful; that's being unfulfilled.

I want to say that again. If you're grateful and still not satisfied, you're unfullfilled, not ungrateful. So tell that to Aunt Sandra when she criticizes you over pumpkin pie.

Wanting to be fulfilled is not selfish, wrong, or too much to ask for. In fact, being fulfilled in your work creates the conditions that allow you to do your best work and be of the most service. There's nothing selfish about that. you need more gratitude for what you have, or do you need something new that will fulfill you? Think about it while you finish off the last of the turkey.

How to Be New in Business Without Being a Fraud

You’d like to start a business and already have some of it planned out in your head. But who are you kidding? Why would someone pay you when there are more experienced people out there? You’re no expert; you’d be a fraud to take their money!


Seeing what your role models have done and allowing that to encourage you is called inspiration.

Seeing what your role models have done and allowing that to stop you is called comparison. And it’s deadly. It kills careers, and it kills dreams. 

13 Reasons to WAIT Before Starting Your Business

You want to start a business, but your tendency is to wait. 

Wait until you have all the answers
Wait until starting your business doesn’t feel overwhelming
Wait for other people to approve
Wait until you can quit your job
Wait until you’re comfortable introducing yourself as a business owner
Wait until you’re as polished as people who have been in business for years
Wait until you pick the perfect brand colors or font
Wait until you have a professional headshot
Wait until you can spend $10K on a website designer & developer & branding strategist
Wait until you have a drool-worthy Instagram account
Wait until your first client drops out of the sky
Wait for a sign that you’re ready
Wait for someone else to tell you to go ahead

But the thing is...